Let's skip ahead, my lovelies, to a time in the future ...
Here in our fair land
Here in the Land of the Fish
Our Island is swarming with tourists.
Lured here by those charming and legendry ads (they were such a hit, they are now an Act of the Legislature)
that continue still to dazzle travellers with our colourful cultural palette.
The year is 2066
Much has changed in the world
But the Isle of the Cod remains untouched.
553 years of an enduring culture that has withstood the
hands of time,
the unending crashing Atlantic waves upon its shores.
Folks still cling to the rocks and still dance a jig on the wharves
Fishing Boats can be seen bobbing the waves offshore
The majestic and massive iceberg sculptures don the glistening waters.
Harp, there's a whale breaching the unspoiled Atlantic ocean.
Oh, look, there's the puffins, such remarkable and colourful creatures.
Yes, let me take you out on the water for a jig of our famous Cod.
After all, the once-nearly extinct fish is again teeming in these waters.
No need for a hook folks, I tell the enthusiastic touristy lot.
"Do it the John Cabot style!" and I hand them baskets
Yes, us Newfoundlanders still have their sense of humor.
The tourists appreciate that; and the fact that we can now fish any day of the year, as the Cod are so darn plentiful.
The tourist are in their glee - thanking the gods that the authentic and the traditional have survived in this world where everything has changed.
I walk with them up a path to the local B&B and there's a scoff waiting for us .
Traditional food is served - Jiggs Dinner, fried Cod and scrunchions, fish cakes and bakeapples picked off the marsh this morning.
We still have it ALL here in Newfoundland - still Canada's youngest province after all these years -
The beautiful outports, the friendly people, scrumptious food and oh, the crayon colours of this place have not even faded...
After supper we stroll down to the beach and light up a fire and roast some caplin as the golden sunset rays splay across the bay.
Musically inclined folks sing "Let me fish off Cape St, Marys"
Story tellers tell of ghosts and fairies.
The tourist are gobsmacked - "like being at being in the middle of a Newfoundland tourist ad", they gleefully shout as they take endless selfies.
Each of them share with me their favourite colours like it was the name of their first-born.
The time has come for them to leave. They are all weepy eye and promised to come back again next year
to the "Land of the Colours and the Cod", as they like to call us now.
So much colour, so much Cod, it's no wonder they love us so much.
They love the outports - those special sacred places created by the Creator himself on the day he was supposed to have rested
Then they wave their final forlorn goodbyes ... like a baby leaving the womb.
Then the bright lights come on.
As they exit, I caution them to be careful
and to leave their 3-D Headset in the bin.
Their comments all bespeak of their love for "The Outport Movie "
- felt like they were right there!
The 3-D virtual reality experience at the Babylyon Mall in St. John's is not the same as the real thing,
but we try our best to give the tourists a taste of how it was back then ...
Some have questions - What happened? What went down? Who allowed this?
I tell them all the outports waned and fizzled and then totally collapsed 50 years ago
Federal governments closed down the fisheries entirely - a permanent moratorium due to extinction of the Cod and other species.
Provincial governments were positively passive and accepting - most of them St. John's elites or outport millionaires
The townies finally got their way - too expensive to keep the outports going they had cried for decades and decades
Ferries were shut down, schools and libraries closed, post offices barred up and every boat and stage and flake burned.
The feds offered the Last Resettlement Package out of rural Newfoundland and Labarador...
As I flick off the lights and close the door to the theatre, I felt a bit nostalgic but then I forced myself to look on the positive side
I guess it's not that bad ...
I mean, the outports are still "alive and well" - at least in the 3D world.
Still ... things sure ant like it used to be ...
be some nice now to feel and smell the real deal again - of bays, bights, harbours and coves...
and what I wouldn't give for a feed of that cherished Cod....
Respectable, though, that the St. Johns lot at least immortalized our famous fish
- by remaking the entire front of the old Confederation Building
to look like a Cod ... on a large altar.
Cod bless their compassionate and evolved souls.